- you were carrying around large dosages of per*cocet and lor*tab just in case you were experiencing any pain.
- you've make scheduled appointments to the head doctor to inject nerve blockers directly into your neck.
- you're on a first name basis with your pharmacist that you've only known for three weeks.
- you've got several dosage amounts of both Lexa*pro and Verap*imil in your pocket.
- you've got a stash of several types of sleep enhancers at your disposal.
- you've got a life time licence to get as much neuro*tin as you please.
- you feel dirty walking onto a drug free school zone knowing what you are carrying in your purse.
OK so I promise that I'm not dealing to any of the little kiddos out there but all I can say is if I ever ran low on money, I know where I could make a quick penny or two.
I guess I should explain my absence (and my above comments). If you haven't guessed already, it's not because I've been on a knitting run and just couldn't stop to put down the needles to post. Actually the pleasure of knitting has slowed during this unhealthy time. Since Honey left I've been coming to terms with the word *depression*. It's an ugly but very real word. I now have insight to what so many American females are suffering from. It's a horrible spiraling condition to find yourself in. Once you realize that you're not yourself you start performing behaviors that aren't you even more which makes you feel guilty and bad about said self therefore falling deeper into the hands of the beast that started the whole thing in the first place. I am currently exploring the world of medicating that beast to keep him at bay. For now I've got him at a 10 foot pole. There is still work to do.
If that wasn't bad enough, the migraines are back. They caused a few fun trips to the emergency room where all sorts of happy drugs were administered, but somebody forgot to tell my body that it was supposed to enjoy the drugs or at least react a little to them in some why. From one of those visits they found a damaged nerve in my neck resulting in more so called happy drugs. These things just barely touch the pain let alone leave in me la-la land. What's up with that!?!?
My blood pressure is through the roof - still - so my body is officially falling into the generational line of my mother and grandmother. So why don't I have the big boobs to go with those genes???
On a good note, I am sleeping better. With all the drugs they've got me on they do seem to agree on one general side affect - sleepiness.